When Andrew prepared to meet My face-to-face for the first time four years ago Urban Putt, an indoor golf course in the Mission District of San Francisco, he was nervous. “What if she’s a catfish, man?” was what he wrote to his friend as he waited for her at the bar (which by the way serves surprisingly good grilled cheese). He knew she probably wasn’t. A couple of weeks of talking on Bumble and he had pretty much Insta-stalked her enough to know this was a real live person. But can someone really be that cool? She says (as we are writing this), “Yes, yes I was and am that cool.” Andrew had a clear strategy for navigating the app dating world. Talk to a lot of people to see if they’re interesting enough, but commit to dates weeks out so that he would have plenty of chances to change his mind later on if they ended up being weird. That could’ve very well been the way it went for him and My too, but there was something about her he had a good feeling about.

The Asian side of the wedding probably has a lot of questions right about now. What? Bumble? Is that a thing do kids really do that now? That’s kind of true…My saw Andrew’s profile while she was swiping at work (because why not), and as she was about to “swipe left!” on his profile her work colleague stopped her. “I know that guy! I went to high school with him. He might be nice.” My looked at the frat bro pictures from Arizona State and thought “I mean, he would have to be REALLY nice.” Turns out, he was nice based on some back channeling the colleague did for her.

The first two messages to each other probably should’ve just ended there. On Bumble, the woman makes the first move and My is terrible at pick-up lines. Lazy as she was, she just wrote “Hey what’s up.” Andrew sent back a GIF from Friends with Joey Tribbiani going “How YOU doin’?” My was unimpressed and said “What’s wrong with you?” This kicked off the rest of their lives as well pretty much set the tone for it as well. It was also how they both found themselves at an Urban Putt that fateful night in San Francisco.

My was 25 minutes late because Vietnamese time and Andrew remembers the first time he saw her. All 5’1 with her platinum blonde hair (yes platinum blonde hair) bouncing into the bar and he knew right away “Ok, not a catfish.” They had an 8-hour date after this, driving all over San Francisco, and have been inseparable since.

Inseparable mainly because Andrew haunts her like a Babadook. Two weeks after their first date, My had two business trips to New York and Vancouver, and Andrew, who hadn’t really ever traveled by himself bought plane tickets to both places. He moved in two months later and she hasn’t been rid of him since.